


walk out

by trashmouthz



Category: Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters (Anime & Manga)
Genre: M/M, Marik is sad, Sadness, a bit of violence, honestly you can see ryo if you squint, it doesn't make a lot of sense but hey marik doesn't make a lot of sense either does he?, just for the sake of context, marik and malik are different beings, no beta we die like men, translated from spanish
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-28
Updated: 2020-04-28
Packaged: 2021-03-02 02:55:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 636
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23897866
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/trashmouthz/pseuds/trashmouthz
Summary: Marik Ishtar suffers and feels more human than he ever wanted.
Relationships: Bakura Ryou/Yami Marik
Comments: 2
Kudos: 3





	walk out

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [walk out](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/622558) by Trashmouthz. 



> I don’t know what I wanted to do here, anyway, Malik≠Marik. What I wanted here was to keep Marik being Malik’s other personality but in the end I decided I didn’t want that, so now this is an AU because I don’t want Marik thrown out into the inexistence. Hints of deathshipping? I guess?

Marik knows he’s not welcome in the world of sunlight, not anymore. Once more he was thrown out to a world of eternal and ever-changing shadows like a piece of garbage about to get spoiled ( _why? It’s not enough?_ ). And nevertheless, he maintains a smile on his face, not one that’s pretty and symmetrical but a smile indeed ( _of defeat_ ), he keeps his gaze on his tanned arms trying to guess the blue path of his veins. He thinks it would be easier if his skin was pale and thinner ( _so, so pale and thin like the one certain paper bunny he knows has_ ).

Accompanied only by the sound of his nose while he breathes, he lets the shadows comfort him. Everything was better, a lot, when Marik didn’t know that there was one thing in his chest that would hurt so much. Physically, yes, he knew there’s an organ that keeps him alive; emotionally, there was nothing there, nothing more than a black hole that absorbed whatever emotion that was not rage and his thirst for blood, because they were not ( _they are not_ ) welcome. 

Anything besides his rage that burns him like the Sun from the inside was not allowed. Because since he was born Marik has never been loved, just one time; his lifeless eyes close, there are no more bitter memories now when he thinks of soft white strands of a head he used to see fluttering around him. He was never treated with the same care you treat a human being, he was nothing more than a monster who has to be feared; a sigh wants to escape from him but he doesn’t let it, not if it means to lose even more from himself than he already has lost. Marik knows how much it hurts when things matter and even so he let _it_ matter, how much it hurts to feel, and even so he let himself feel for _him_. He thinks that feelings are for weak people who need others to survive and they constantly give themselves excuses with mere illusions caused by those toxic sensations that cloud the judgment. His lavender eyes since some time ago are focused on nothing. If only…

_If only—_

No.

“ _Marik, do you love me?”_

No… ( _yes, yes, yes!_ )

Something unbearable and invisible grows in his chest and climbs up until it reaches the bottom of his throat and gets stuck in there, it makes him feel like he’s unable to breathe anymore. He hits there with his fist hoping that the flow of air goes back to normal and he gurgles. Marik explodes and soon he lunges against a white wall with his forehead. Blow, after blow, after blow, after blow, he hopes the memories that suffocate him get lost. Spots of blood start to build-up over the neatness that starts fading. Marik won’t cry, because Marik doesn’t know how to cry.

“ _I love you so much, Marik!_ ”

It’s a lie, it’s a lie! Because he wouldn’t have disappeared if that was the case. Because his smile wouldn’t be getting smaller with the passing of time until his face showed nothing but tiredness and contempt for him. Because now Marik hates the white and he wants it to disappear from everywhere and to forget at last.

Just once, one person made Marik felt like he was loved. Just once, one person was able to jump over the wide walls that were constructed against the world and everything was _invaded_. Just once, Marik stopped feeling alone. 

“ _Please_ ,” Marik says, “ _please_ …” Marik implores in silence so the white color leaves his memories. His eyelids are heavy, his head hurts, Marik paints himself in black and he hides between the shadows to avoid being noticed, so no one can see how vulnerable he is. 

  
  
  
“ _Goodbye_ ”.


End file.
